Found And Lost Read online

  I found her sitting on a bench outside crying. “Hey, you scared me. Are you alright? What’s wrong?”

  “I know those girls, CJ. I was crashing with them in Amarillo for nearly a year. They were like sisters to me. That guy Snake, he killed Alli. We subdued him, and the cops took him away. My sisters ended up in the State’s care. They helped me get away before the State showed up to get us. I shouldn’t have run out on them. I could have protected them.”

  I hugged her. “Mia, you couldn’t have stopped what happened. You just would have ended up in the same situation. Or worse, with Jackson. I’m sorry your friends were hurt and are missing, regardless, I’m glad you ran, or we never wouldn’t have met.”

  Mia cried a while longer than wiped her tears. “Can we go home?”

  I liked hearing Mia call the ranch home. “Anything you want, Mi’amore.”

  Mia was depressed and tired after seeing the news. She excused herself before heading up to her room. When I peeked in on her a while later, she was sound asleep. I heard her come down the stairs a few hours later. I found her in the great room, huddled by the fire, shivering. Her skin had an ashy tone to it. “Are you alright? You look terrible.”

  “Sooo cccold,” Mia answered. I brought her a blanket. All of a sudden, she dropped the blanket and ran to the bathroom to throw up. She staggered back to the fire and sat down, shaking again. “I don’t feel very well.”

  Picking her up, I carried her to the couch. “I’ll get Mom.” By the time we got back, Mia was sleeping. Just as I dragged Mia onto my lap, she started to convulse. I was scared to death.

  Many of our kind died during the first change. I’d lost two brothers and a sister to it already. I wasn’t there when they died. I’d been too little to witness their change. I still missed them every day.

  Mia was a full-blooded werewolf, which gave her better odds of survival than bitten wolves, making them slim at best. Our kind were usually prepared for the change. Besides knowing what to expect, we were fed lots of protein. We exercised to keep our muscles tone and flexible.

  Even then, only a third of us made it through the grueling process of having our bones broken and reshaped while skin and muscle was stretched and torn. Yeah, it’s as bad as it sounds.

  The first time is the worst. If our bodies manage to survive the strain of that first time, it becomes easier. It’s almost like once we change the first time, our body has an imprint of that other form and reshapes itself without an issue.

  I mean, don’t get me wrong, it still hurts. The difference is every consecutive shift is faster because our body no longer resists it. The pain is fleeting and quickly forgotten while we experience the freedom we have enjoying our baser nature.

  Mia was in excellent shape; that was one thing in her favor. Mom handed me a wet cloth. “This will help a little, CJ. You need to talk to her. Let her know what’s happening to her. Mia needs to relax and not fight this change.”

  Laying the cloth across Mia's forehead, I said a silent prayer for God to bring her through the change. “Mia, you need to try and relax. The more you relax, the easier the change will be. Right now, your body is fighting it. I know it’s painful. Try to take slow, deep breaths. After a while, it’s as easy as changing your clothes.”

  As I talked, I kept smoothing her hair back. “After you change, we’ll run the forest together, Mia. I’ll show you how wonderful it can be. Every scent, every sound is so clear, and you can see for miles. It’s amazing.”

  When she started to convulse violently again, I didn’t know what to do. I looked at Mom. “All we can do is wait, CJ.”

  Mia’s eyes flutter open. Looking up at me, she whispered, “Hurts!”

  “I know. It will hurt less if you relax.” Her convulsions eased up as she seemed to be relaxing. My wolf paced inside my head, worrying about his mate. In that instant, I realized Dad was right. Mia was not only my mate; I’d already fallen completely in love with her. Now I was scared to death I’d lose her.

  Shakily, Mia reached up and touched my face. “Don’t be scared for me, CJ. It will be alright.” I couldn’t believe it; even in this much pain, she was trying to comfort me.

  I took a deep breath and smiled at her. If Mia could be brave, so could I. “I know, Mi’amore.” The moon was reaching its peak, and she began to convulse harder than before. Mia’s eyes closed, and she screamed as her back arched in pain. Then she went utterly still. She was barely breathing. I looked up at my mom in panic.

  Mom just shook her head. I saw the tears in her eyes. I knew she was probably remembering going through this before. “There’s nothing I can do, CJ. Nature has to take its course.” Dad, who had just got home, joined us. He looked as scared as me. His arms went around my mom.

  As I continued to stroke Mia’s hair, I watched as her body change into the shape of a wolf. Her face contracted as her jaw elongated. Her torso, arms, and legs became shorter, thinner, shaped like an animal. Her fingers curled in as her hands and feet became paws.

  I could feel muscles and bones snapping, popping, and twisting as they reformed themselves. Deep copper fur flowed over her new body in an instant. Suddenly I was now holding a full-sized, though petite, wolf on my lap.

  That was when Mia stopped breathing. “No, no, no, no!” I yelled in panic. To my relief, a few seconds later, Mia drew in a deep breath, opening her eyes. With a graceful twist of her body, she got to her feet, giving herself a shake.

  She stood staring at me with glowing, green eyes. She was magnificent. I’d never seen a wolf-like her before. She had maintained the color of her hair and eyes almost precisely.

  Mia turned toward my mother, turning her head to the side expectantly. “Ready to meet the pack, Sweetheart,” Mom asked her. Mia whined her approval.

  We changed form as Mia watched. Mom was a blondish, light, brown-colored wolf, the same as I was. Dad was a giant brown wolf and Alpha of our pack. Dad was the largest wolf I’d ever met. He insisted I would be as large when I finished filling out. I had my doubts. It was not his size, however, but his wisdom that made our pack love him. He stepped toward Mia. Mia walked up and rubbed against him. She thought, “I remember you like this. I owe you so much.”

  “Then stay with us. Be part of our family and our pack. You do not have to decide tonight. Run with the pack. Give us time to teach you what it means to be a werewolf.” Dad thought back.

  I walked up to Mia and rubbed her nose with mine before we all went through the large doggie door that was built into our front door. Mia giggled in my mind. “I didn’t notice that there before.”

  “It comes in handy.” I thought back. The pack was waiting outside. They all came forward and greeted Mia by rubbing her nose.

  I turned and thought to Mia, “Catch me if you can.” Before I took off running and the pack followed. I was the fastest wolf in the pack and way ahead. Racing around tree trunks, leaping over boulders and fallen logs as I ran, I glanced back. To my surprise, Mia was right behind me. I started to run faster when all of a sudden, I felt Mia leap onto my back.

  Stumbling to the ground, we rolled over until she had her paws on my chest. “Take that, show off.” She thought before darting off again.

  Dan was thinking, “Would you look at that. Our cocky wolf has met his match.” Laughter from the rest of the pack filled my mind.

  Mia was running gracefully through the forest, avoiding obstacles in her path like she had been doing it all her life. It was a beautiful sight to behold. When I caught up to her, she had stopped dead in her tracks and was sniffing the air. “What is that?” She thought.

  “An Elk. Time for dinner.”

  I thought back as the others caught up. “Mia, you may find this distasteful, but if you let your wolf take over, it won’t be so bad.” I tried to explain as we spread out to hunt the beast. “You scented it first; therefore, the kill is yours if you want.” Mia nodded, quietly creeping forward.

  The others had circled around in case the Elk bolted. That way
, one of us could bring it down. Mia moved silently forward until she was just a few feet away. Looking back at me, she waited. When I nodded, she crept a bit closer then leaped.

  She landed on the elks back and bit into its throat before it even knew she was there. Taking it quickly to the ground, she held onto its throat while it thrashed about. Finally, she tore its throat out completely. It died within seconds.

  My father thought, “That was amazing. I have never seen a new wolf make a kill before. You do your parents proud.”

  “Thank you; I just did what CJ said. I let my instincts take over. Besides, I’ve done this in my dreams for almost two years now.”

  We started to advance when Mia thought firmly, “Wait!” She stood over the elk and thought, “Thank you for the hunt and for sharing your body with us, Elk Spirit. Join your ancestors and run free forever in the Great Beyond.” She turned to the rest of us. “His spirit has moved on; you may eat.” Mia thought to the rest of us.

  Ripping out a piece of meat, Mia dropped it in front of me, before devouring one herself. She was unaware it was mate behavior. “I haven’t seen anyone commend the spirit of an animal to the Great Beyond since I was a child. Thank you for reminding me of the importance of doing so. I’m sorry you didn’t have the guidance of a pack though it seems the wolf dream and your parents served you well.” Dad thought.

  “My parents spent every spare moment teaching me the ways of a werewolf and how to survive on my own. They also taught me to respect all life, be thankful for my blessing, and to never take more than I needed from nature. You are one of those blessings, Chase, and I’ll always be thankful you saved me.”

  “You are very welcome, Child. It was my pleasure.” Dad thought back.

  As the rest of the pack finished off their meal, Mia laid down, licking herself clean. After I had my fill, I went over and joined her. “You were incredible tonight.” I thought to Mia.

  Mia laid her head down on her paws. “I’ve never felt so free and alive. What if I wanted to remain a wolf? Jackson would never find me if I did. I’ve lived alone in the wild for almost four years, but I still had to go to towns to get supplies and stuff. It would be so easy to live wild as a wolf. I would finally be free of it all.”

  I was suddenly filled with apprehension and answered hesitantly, “I’ve heard a few have made that choice. Though it is not easy to lose one’s humanity completely, if you stay in wolf form long enough, I’m told you eventually do go wild and forget who you were. It is tempting sometimes, I suppose. Being human has its good side, too, if you give it a chance.”

  “Maybe. The future remains to be seen, I guess. It would just be nice not to have to worry about being found and to forget. CJ…” Mia thought hesitantly.

  “Yeah?”

  “Would you stay with me again tonight? We could sleep out under the stars. I miss them when I sleep inside.”

  I sighed, thinking about another sleepless night, yet being able to give Mia some comfort was worth a little discomfort. “Sure.”

  Mia jumped to her feet without warning and started racing through the forest, thinking, “Your turn to catch me.” I managed to keep up, barely. I couldn’t quite catch her. Every time I got close, Mia would veer to one side or the other with amazing agility then pull ahead. I’d never seen a werewolf so agile.

  As we got close to the ranch, Mia had to slow down, which was when I made my leap. As I connected, I rolled to the side to avoid having the impact hurt her. Pinning her to the ground, I could hear the laughter in her mind. “You win, but that was cheating.” She thought.

  “Hey, all’s fair in love and racing.” I thought back.

  Mia licked my snout before rolling onto her feet. “This is the most fun I’ve ever had.” Mia thought.

  “Wait here.” I thought. I jogged up to the barn and dragged a sleeping bag out. Mia sat there watching with her head cocked sideways like she wondered what I was doing. “We’ll change back if we sleep to deeply. It might get cold.”

  “Ah.” She came over to the sleeping bag and laid down on it. I laid down beside her, breathing in her scent. Before she changed, she’d smelled like fresh honeysuckle and jasmine. Now it was mixed with wolf. Her scent was intoxicating as it enveloped my senses. I felt a deep need to keep Mia beside me always.

  Though I was sure Mia was my mate, I doubted she was ready to hear it, so I kept it to myself. I also knew if it were true, she would be unable to leave my side for long. I couldn’t believe fate had brought this beautiful creature to me. I thanked God for this precious gift as she snuggled against me, and we drifted off to sleep.

  A Home

  Mia

  Iawoke refreshed, albeit a bit sore. Giving a languorous stretch, I laid back, thinking about how wonderful the night had been. I’d felt free and powerful. Then I felt an arm around me. I realized I was lying in CJ’s arms. It took me a minute before I realized we were both naked. I jumped up, yanking the sleeping bag out from under him, before wrapping it around me.

  CJ woke with a start as he rolled onto the grass. “Hey, what, huh?” he muttered in confusion.

  “What the hell, CJ! You’re, we’re, we don’t have any clothes on.” I told him frantically.

  CJ got up, laughing his ass off as he brushed the dirt off himself. “Did you think our clothes would miraculously reappear when we changed back?” He asked as he casually walked over to where a pair of jeans were lying on the ground. “That only happens in the movies.”

  I felt like a deer caught in headlights, unable to look away. CJ was perfectly built. All lean muscle, right down to his taught six-pack abs. When my eyes were drawn to his very large equipment. I blushed profusely before spinning around.

  After he put his pants on, CJ asked, “Better?” His amused tone annoyed me.

  Turning back slowly with my eyes shut tight, I peeked out of one eye before releasing the breath I hadn’t realized I’d been holding. “Where’d you get those? And where are my clothes.”

  “I dragged them out here last night with the sleeping bag. I was planning on waking up early and changing, except you woke up first. The clothes you were wearing yesterday are shredded. You’ll have to go to the house to get dressed.”

  “You could have warned me!” I snapped.

  I stomped to the house, holding the sleeping bag tight around me. My show of righteous indignation blew up in my face when I tripped over the bag, falling flat on my face. CJ was laughing hysterically as he helped me up. “Are you alright?” He managed to get out between his barking laugh.

  “Bite me.”

  “Tempting!” I tried glaring at him; only his laughter was contagious. I ended up laughing with him. As CJ unzipped the bottom of the sleeping bag, then helped me wrap it around me better so I could walk at the same time, his cocky grin slipped away. He suddenly looked very uncomfortable. I had no clue why. I almost asked but decided if he had something to say, he would say it.

  CJ waited outside the bedroom door while I showered and got dressed, then we went down to breakfast. Most of the ranch hands were already there eating. Charlie called out, “Hey Mia; you have grass in your hair. What have you and CJ been up to? Should I be jealous?” I blushed about fifty shade of red.

  CJ yelled back, “I found Mia first, Charlie, so eat your heart out.”

  Dan told me what a great job I’d done hunting last night, which only made me blush harder. I was beginning to realize being around people was very embarrassing at times.

  The others were almost done with their meal and got up to leave. To my surprise, Charlie came over and kissed my cheek. “Well, not all of us get to lounge around all morning. Catch you later, beautiful.”

  Chase got up to leave as well. He was half grinning when he said, “CJ, I assume I can expect you to show up for work sometime this morning?”

  “Yes sir, I’ll catch up in a few.”

  “Have a good day, Mia. I’ll see you tonight.”

  I got up and gave Chase a big hug. “Bye, Chase. Thanks a
gain for everything. I’m really glad I came here.”

  “Me too, Sweetheart, me too.”

  Once he was gone, CJ commented, “Dad thinks a lot of you.”

  “He’s the best! Your mom is too.” Then I asked the question that had been nagging me, “CJ, was it an accident we bumped into each other? I mean, I saw you at the river. I didn’t know you were a werewolf at the time, but still, you turned up in town at the same time as me.”

  CJ stared intently at his plate. “You saw me?”

  “Of course, though, I thought you were a wild wolf at the time. Now that I think about it, that was rather creepy. Are you like a peeping wolf or something?”

  “No! Of course not.” I cocked an eyebrow, making it clear I didn’t entirely believe him. Now CJ’s cheeks flushed. “Look, I scented you then went to check you out. I should have left when I saw you swimming only you were so beautiful. I could look away.”

  “Yeah, right!”

  “Honest Mia. Afterward, I just had to meet you, so I followed you. When I realized you were heading to town, I hung out on Main Street until I saw you walking up the sidewalk. When you crossed over to the market, I decided it was a perfect time to go shopping.

  I was trying to figure out a way to introduce myself when you bumped into me. After that, I found myself not wanting to let you leave. You’ve filled my thoughts every minute since I laid eyes on you. I’m sorry I watched you bathing. That was wrong; however, I’m not sorry for the rest. I’ve never felt about anyone the way I feel about you.”

  I stared at CJ intently. His spirit was glowing like always though it was tinged with anxiety. He felt completely sincere. It was that sincerity that scared the hell out of me.

  What I felt for CJ scared me even more. I liked him as a person and wolf, yet even more than that, my wolf and I were drawn to him in a way I couldn’t explain. I enjoyed his company and felt lost when he wasn’t around.

  Snuggled against his body, in any form, I felt safe and at peace, which were feelings that had eluded me for a long time. If I was willing to admit it to myself, I was probably falling for him. I also knew I should walk away and never look back before it was too late.